Gotta Keep em Seperated!

Separating your life from a person you have been in a relationship with for 12 years and share two children with is quite the task. It’s been a while since I blogged and I’ve left you all hanging with the ending of my last post. Life is ever changing…Body Prints activity has been sparse for the last 6 months. Finding my new normal has been distracting from my creative flow and trajectory, but I’ve managed to create a few paintings in the process.

My ex and I purchased a 2^nd home with intentions to use it as an “Escape” house for both of us to entertain our newly found “Single” selves. By the time escrow had closed the intentions of that house had changed, it’s now my home, my Sugar Shack. Upgrades to the 1950’s charmer have been underway and we are slowly crossing projects to improve it’s condition off the “to do” list. The thing is having your life uprooted and being under construction is stressful, the last few months have been one of the most difficult times of my life.

My studio is still in transition. My original studio is now filled with unwanted items from our marriage and is not a usable space to create in and my new studio is not equipped to support my needs for Body Prints creation, so I find myself in limbo. We are working as quickly as we can to get the new studio up to par and I look forward to being able to create again with you all in the coming months. For now I am available for tour style Body Prints painting, but the cold weather can also make this a bit challenging in finding a space that is mess friendly, but also warm enough for the process. I have also begun a new adventure in mural painting. As a mural artist I am definitely new to the scene but enjoyed creating this tree for a client and am excited to watch it grow as she adds her family and friends handprints to it over the years. If you or anyone you know is looking for a mural style painting, keep me in mind. I want to thank you all for your continued support and encouraging words along this journey, without you I could not keep on keepin on!This Phoenix Body Prints painting created for one of my clients and currently displayed in her home couldn’t have come at a more poetic time. As my life has been unfolding over the last few months and actually leading up to the inevitable split there have been many signs that as painful as this path may be at times, it is meant to be. Meeting the people I have been meeting along the way and discovering deeper friendships with people who have been in my life for years has been a gift, a glimmer of light and guidance in this sometimes dreary existence. There are so many strong women I have met going through similar situations and handling it like a boss and inspiring me to try harder, to pull myself out of despair and kick up my heels whenever I get the chance. The Phoenix is re-born from the ashes, what is still unclear for me is when the fire will stop.This Body Prints painting was created after I acknowledged that my Heart Chakra has been in a damaged state for quite some time, causing me extreme physical pain in my back…simplified explanation is that my body knew I should no longer be in my relationship long before I consciously did. I have pursued some therapy and found some relief in listening to binaural beats to aid in sleep restoration. I’ve also found dating and the hope of new love to be reparative. The creation of this painting was therapeutic as well and it is currently displayed in my bedroom to remind me of my goal for an Open Heart Chakra. Oh, and it glows! If you or anyone you know does energy work I would be very interested in trading services with them.Among the many emotions healing from a life change like this brings up, this painting appropriately displays the more boastful and proud side of my ego because anyone that would screw up a life with me obviously is blind to the fact that I am a f@*k!n Unicorn! This piece is proudly displayed at Picasso & Wine in the Summit Mall where you can find me teaching classes on any given Wednesday or Saturday night. I also happily teach classes at the Vassar location as well, so if you need some art & wine therapy and aren’t quite ready for a Body Prints painting session, you can also find me here. Check out the current class schedule to come to one of my painting parties! http://picasso-wine.com/calendar/My bit of wisdom…It took me 12 years to learn and accept that once trust has been broken, it cannot be re-built, to stay in a relationship after trust has been broken, by any means is an act similar to the behavior of a drug addict because what you are looking for and hoping for is to feel the high you felt in the beginning or the 1^st time or any time before it was broken, but you can never feel that again. So, I won’t allow that treatment in my life again. I’ve often advised friends and myself over the years that if there is love, you should fight for it, stay after trust is broken, re-build for the sake of preserving a lasting relationship. I placed so much value on the longevity that I could obtain, largely for the security of my children, but also for myself. Coming from a broken home I wanted more than anything to not repeat that for my own children, but this shituation is different than my childhood. The leading man is actually not a bad person and he is a wonderful father. He and I continue to do our best to make good choices for them and attempt to communicate with as much grace as possible, though some days I fail horribly at handling our conversations with kindness and warmth and he can push my buttons and trigger my ugly side like no other, I know that we will find our way through this because, this too shall pass.

I’m doing my best to make the journey pretty along the way, to live in the moment and use art as a way to process and share my experience with you. I’m looking forward to the New Year more than ever  before and hope to find myself on the flip side in a painting frenzy bringing the Body Prints painting experience to more and more people along the way.